Saturday, May 30, 2009

THE SECRET TO A GOOD MARRIAGE

Before leaving this world, one thing I wish to leave for the betterment of mankind, is how to survive womankind! Yes, that tricky fine edge between wedded bliss and the great abyss.

The other day, TLW (The Little Woman) and I were out in the pool area. It seems that the pool is still covered for the winter, and we needed to pump out the water that rests on top of the cover, and then remove all the leaves that have fallen in. TLW loves to take charge! Yes, that thing that all women do so well is taking over for the mate. It constantly happens in nature, just reference the black widow spider!

Having a master plan is what it is all about. Knowing how to utilize the available manpower to the maximum. The pool can be as very trying experience! Fortunately, there are the workers and the queen bee.

“OK, we need to shift our strategies here. I think we should pump some water under the tarp to raise the level, so we can see what we are working with here.”

Me; “Yes, the water is so muddy I can’t tell how many leaves are left at the bottom!”

TLW: “And when you pull out the leaves, put them on the side to dry out.”

Me: “Yes, dear!”

Now, that was simple, and direct, from the queen bee to the worker. Nice, neat and no back talk is going on, you notice? Does a general ever get back talk from a private? Does a CEO ever get back talk from a night guard? Does a manager ever get back talk from a rookie? A resounding: “NO!” And they never back talk to their wives, either! However, the spider does sometimes. (See above reference.)

The pool pump was pumping properly.

“Can you look at the pump, it doesn’t seem to be working.”

Me: “OK, I’ll take it apart.”

While I hold the pump, TLW stands next to me, tells me that the cover has to come off the housing, that the tool I’m holding is not the right one, and hands me a butter knife.

Me: “Gee, all these years I was buttering toast, I should have been opening the pool pump!”

TLW: “Ha ha!” (A sneer and a dirty look do not go well on her sweet face!)

Me; Like the coward I am, “Hee hee, sorry!”

So, what is the advice? I’m sure you guys have all heard it before; just say “Yes, dear!” smile, and move on.

Please remember all those that need our hopes and prayers, including MMB (My Man Bill) and my brother-in-law

2 comments:

Jim Pantaleno said...

Spoken like a true married man. One of the few advantages of diminished hearing as I get older is that I no longer clearly hear everything my wife says. I figure either no reply is needed, or if it is, she will repeat herself. I write this secure in the knowledge that "she who must be obeyed" doesn't read this blog.

Joseph Del Broccolo said...

you got my word on it!