I’M CALIFORNIA BOUND

And bound to get there, the trouble is TLW (The Little Woman) and I have to pack.

JFK

Packing for a long trip is a pain in the butt, you have to plan ahead and you have to anticipate. Having to go through Homeland Security is a big pain in my butt also. It starts with knowing what you can bring on the plane and what you can’t, especially in carry-on luggage. Taking your laptop can be an issue in that you have to take it out and place it separately in a tray, then you need to empty your pockets and all metal objects can’t go through the detector on your person without being scanned first!

Then there is the issue of belt and shoes. There is always the authoritative attitude of the airport Nazis in how they speak to the public, and how angry it can make you. They don’t care if they are disrespectful or annoying. You take off your shoes and put them in a tray and hope they along with everything else comes out from that leather curtain on the conveyor belt.

We had the shoe bomber, and the underwear bomber: they made us take off our shoes, but thank God not our underwear! However, they can see everything in their x-ray machine, which makes me want to carry a cucumber in my pocket! What the Hell, why not impress them?

Homeland Security Porn

Then there is the issue of TLW. TLW is the most organized person I know of. She could pack you off for a ten-year journey into the mountains, jungles and North Pole, and you would have everything you need in order of use and still be able to brush your teeth and pick them too.

“Now we have to pack our medications separately in the carry on.”

Me: “Why?”

“Because if they lose your luggage, you will at least have your meds!”

“OK, do you want to bring the GPS too?”

“That will go into the carry-on too.”

“But we wouldn’t need it until after we land.”

“And YOU will unpack the suitcase in the parking garage at the car rental to get it out?”

“Oh!” (Best I could say.)

I get a charge out of flying

Now that we are so electronically equipped, we need chargers for our camera batteries, our Kindles, cell phones, laptops, and so it goes. I remember when packing was a simple chore, no screening, just checking in. Now everything about the airport is a big production, including getting to the airpark location and allowing time to get to the airport from there.

The reason we are going to California is to visit #1 Son and TLC (The Lovely Courtney) for a while and see their new home. Maybe what I’ll do rather than all that packing is ask them to send me pictures of their new house instead.

I know, I’m such a creep!