OOOOOH, WHAT I SAID!

Every year around the end of February or the beginning of March, I am asked to create a poster for the church of the parish’s second grade class of communion candidates. It includes going to each class and photographing each of the 17 classes and their teachers.

Then once the Photos are all shot, I do any retouching or adjusting and design a 20” x 30” poster for the church to display for the proud parents to have a big party and recognize the accomplishment. I do the design and send it to a printer and then I mount the poster, using a spray mount that is in an aerosol can.

When you use an aerosol spray can, you MUST be careful to shake the can than test spray and then carefully aim the can in the correct direction. This requires a minimum amount of intelligence and ability and any moron can do this without incident! I know because I’ve done it about a quarter million times.

However, there comes a time when even the simplest of tasks become overwhelming. For instance, take the spray can, in fact, take it out of my hand because I am incapable of using it without supervision! You see dear reader, I never checked to see if I had the can pointed in the correct direction, using the can by me, pointed at me, and used it full blast, covering my glasses and face! I am sure you are not surprised by all this, as I wasn’t.

Mentioning this to TLW (The Little Woman), she said something that was very true: “Oh! I’m glad I wasn’t around to hear your language!”

It took me a good amount of time to clean those glasses, more than it took to deliver the finished poster!

It reminds me of this story.

Celebrating The Raise My sister landed a good job with an accounting firm, and after a while she got a generous raise. The day she found out about it, her husband picked her up from work, and they stopped for ice cream. As they continued home, my sister blurted out, "Isn't it hard to believe that I have a job that pays this much money?" Just then, she went to toss the last of her ice cream cone out the window. However, the window was closed, and it smacked against the glass. Her husband replied calmly, "Yes."

Happy Birthday to Linda Mark, celebrating her 39^th once again!