MY HOFFA/SIMPSON THEORY

As you know, a lot is being written about the recent attempt to locate Jimmy Hoffa’s body. Last seen alive in 1975 at a Detroit-area restaurant rendezvous supposedly with a New Jersey Teamster boss and a mafia type, he suddenly disappeared.

Old homme of the NY Giants AND Mr. Hoffa?

Of course way back in the 70’s is when the Giants Stadium was being built in the Meadowlands in New Jersey. Speculation was, that maybe Hoffa was buried in one of the end-zone pilings of the stadium: thus the New Jersey connections. I always became confused when I went to a Giants game at the Meadowlands: not knowing which end Hoffa was staying at.

Then he was spotted once or twice with Elvis, and some think you might even find him where the real killer of Nichole Simpson is hiding. I wish they would release O.J. because he vowed to help find the killer!

For my part, O.J. got what he deserved, stealing his stuff from auctioneers and collectors, and I have never forgiven him for what he did to the Fighting Irish in Southern California one afternoon in the fall way back when and the New York Jets in Buffalo and Shea Stadiums every winter.  A retired professional football player and actor, who rushed for over 2,000 yards, he no longer rushes anywhere since there is no room in his cell, and nowhere to rush to. He now spends his time in the prison workshop making gloves that are one size fits all.

I guess he made some silly decisions and so I now call him Oh Gee Simpson!

As far as Mr. Hoffa goes, let me clear up a misconception: he was NOT Italian! Mr. Hoffa was if

anything, Pennsylvanian Dutch! Yes, that’s right, Pennsylvanian Dutch. You’d think with his mafia aura, and a vowel sitting out there in his last name like that, he’d be Italian. But no, there is very little use for the letter ‘H’ in Italian. And so you know the reason why he disappeared in the first place, pushing himself off as an Italian and hanging with mobsters, once they found out, they buried him where no one would find him. After all, you can fool Mother Nature, but don’t mess with the mob!

If you wish to disagree with this assessment, don’t bother, look at what happened to Wanna-Be Italian Mr. Hoffa.