DelBloggolo: OH HOW I HATE IT

Monday, November 24, 2014

OH HOW I HATE IT

It’s another visit to the young cardiologist, Dr. Havaheart, the monitor of all things heartbeat in DelBloggolo. He will ask how I am, if I exercise and diet and whatever else he can ask that will make me squirm. This time I am waiting for him: I’m loaded with good answers!

I joined a gym and so far am religious about it, I am carefully monitoring my diet, and the best thing is I am enjoying the workouts and the change of food. It is like going to a foreign land for the first time and experiencing new things. I am even sleeping better, feeling good during the day and encouraged about the possible outlook. I will be given a stress test, one of three: one is on the treadmill, one waiting in his waiting room and one where I fill out forms that piled up measure 4 to 5 inches thick. This isn’t even mentioning the finding of a space in his parking lot.

I’m a people watcher: I try to figure out personalities, what they like and do for a living and whether or not they have a shady past. This last item is the most fun since if they look like nice people, I can set my imagination to something that even surprises me after I dream it up. So that is how I deal with the waiting room.

Last time I made an appearance at the heart shop, the good doctor asked if I exercised, and I answered that I have three flights of stairs in my house. “I’ll take that as a no!” said Junior. We all have our own way of expressing ourselves.

I will spend at least three hours there, then they will butcher my last name and call me into the examining room and give me a cardiogram, and I will then wipe away the stuff they spread on you like butter of garlic bread. Junior’s mom will open the door and let Junior in to question me and order 150 tests in the next month. Why? Because the staff needs the practice and he needs the lunch money!

He’ll ask me what I did for a living, what I do now and what the future holds for me and I will ask him what Santa is bringing him this year.

Of course once I go home tomorrow, I will pass the many restaurants that are calling out my name, (without butchering it) and I will take out one part of the prayer “The Our Father” that goes: "And lead us not, into temptation!"

And so I ask once again: Why am I doing this? And TLW (The Little Woman) will answer: To save YOU: that’s why! And I will retort: “For what???”