Friday, May 08, 2015


While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!"
"Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!"
"Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore.
About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?"
"We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said.
"The sharks got 'em."

The other day #2 Son and I went out to buy a car for him. He asked me to go with him and I did. All our adult lives we buy cars, and I have bought mostly new cars for me and used cars when my sons were younger, or they got my old car.

I like buying cars, it puts me in my element and looking at the features are always fun, dealing with salesmen is another story. Being how #2 Son didn’t want to purchase a new car, but something enough to get around in the terrible weather elements of Westchester County in the winter, we opted for something high off the ground and with a large wheelbase. A Jumbo 747 comes to mind but there were none on the lots.

First stop was Smithtown Toyota Used Cars and Rich the friendly, humble salesman who according to him is the greatest salesman since Jimmy Swaggart!  Yes Rich asked us to go on the website and go to his page and read all the love letters to him, stating what a honest and truly wonderful man he is, or was up until we met him. Not to put pressure on us, if we paid cash as I was promising he could get credit for the end of the month for the sale, since it was the last day of the month.

The most interesting thing about Rich was his story about his past, and what he did prior to life in the saleroom and dealing with the DelBloggolo clan. He was an art director!  Yes, and he kept his pride and joy artwork in his computer, showing off the worst design sense I have ever seen. If he was working for me, I’d send him back to his computer and re think what he thought was so grand. He said he never had an office with a window, and I told him my first job had a corner office with windows all around me on the 32 floor on Lexington Avenue. He wanted to know how I got that job.  I told him they wanted me, and I could design.

We shifted the conversation when suddenly his cell phone rang and his end of the conversation went like this:
“I really can’t talk to you now, I’m with a client.  Well I can’t do anything about it, take care of it!”

He replaced the receiver and told us his wife just called him to tell him his 17 and 14-year old daughters needed a babysitter, the babysitter lined up opted out.

We left Rich dangling and headed to another dealership, where we entered and went to the receptionist and I said to the young woman we were interested in a horseless carriage. She giggled and got us madam Butterfly, and elderly woman who should have shed her high spiked heels and tight corduroy pants years ago. The pants were so tight that she had to take small steps, ad said: “Come this way!” Neither #2 son nor I can walk that way. She was certainly out of her element.

The salesman sat behind his computer, not lifting his head, so we checked to see if his vital signs were apparent, and there was a slow steady breathing. Slowly he came around to moving his head slightly and started to breath. He went through a list of cars he had available and we test drove one, which sounded like the Jumbo 747 we were missing in the other lot. Not only did the noise level seem very high, but the acceleration was erratic and jumped too much when you fed it gas. Thank you, but no thank you.

We returned to Rich, the greatest salesman who has ever lived.

Rich, we returned because we felt bad that it was the last day of the month and you were having babysitter problems. Suddenly we were his model of a customer, he was “Humble to work with us” and BS artist of the first magnitude. The only thing keeping our interest was a certain car #2 Son
test-drove and liked for the way it handled and the price was only slightly over his initial budget. The only thing he didn’t like was the looks of the car. He was right and to me the car looked like a bad haircut, but he drove away with it by paying cash after a couple of hours of dealing with the insurance and a bank check and new plates. He was in his Element.



Address: 1231 Taft Hwy, Signal Mountain, TN 37377
Hours: Open today · 10:00 am – 6:00 pm

You should, you'll be (you guessed it) in your element!

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