Friday, October 09, 2015

WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?


The clan had begun to settle in when sleeping arrangements were put together.  Our visit to Connecticut was going as expected, Dad was not letting us down. Mom and Dad would have a bedroom and everyone else found a mattress or a cot or a couch or just the hardness of the floor. (You can fall asleep eventually)

The bedroom Mom and Dad shared was one of a few, but the only one that the group could use, there were some young ladies who lived on the campus and occupied the back bedrooms, who we expected to return to their rooms for the evening. It was Spring break so the space was available for a week.

Dad was not happy about the arrangement because he had to be careful that he didn’t embarrass himself, my mother or the young ladies returning to the dorm.

Once again, Dad was primed.

Dad slept in his shorts, so he was very conscious of anyone seeing him. We ALL had to pass through the bedroom to get to where we were sleeping!

I went in first, and knocked, Dad jumped into the bed and fell out.

“Manugia giuliala manugia! Why didn’t you tell us you were coming?

I knocked Dad!” 

My brother-in-law knocks-Boom, Dad hits his head on the bedpost as he dives once more. At this point everyone who can’t see is wondering what is going on. Dad is now furious, “Why didn’t we get some rooms Va Napolie?”

Mom: “because you were too cheap Anthony, remember?”

Dad gets out of the bed in his shorts to fix the mattress that had slid slightly off the bed with Mom in it. As he is leaning over the foot of the bed, in his shorts, the door opens unannounced: the two girls were home, heading to their respective rooms!

There stood Dad, in his shorts, a bump on his forehead and a mortified look on his face, ready with the customary mixture of Italian/American swear words.

The girls look at Dad, stare forward and rush into their rooms. By now everyone comes running into Mom and Dad’s room.

Someone says: “WHAT HAPPENED, WE HEARD A BANG! WHAT’S GOING ON?”

Dad: “Fongoola, I’ll tell you what happened, get me outta this goddamned place, that’s what happened!

Mom relates the whole experience as she saw it, laughing while trying not to, and now the whole place is in hysterics, maybe the whole campus.

As you know, the next day was his best work yet!

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