Saturday, April 23, 2016

LA MIA MOGLIE (DELL'ITALIANO) MY EYETALIAN WIFE

The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news.”
“What’s the bad news?” asks the accused.
“The bad news is, your blood 
is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it.”
“What’s the good news?”
“Your cholesterol is 130.”

This is a story of love, and it happened in July of 1971 to me.
It started when my new bride and I arrived home from our honeymoon, stopping at England, France, and Italy. We arrived at JFK on Saturday and Sunday we spent together alone. The menu that Sunday was Pot Roast, carrots, and mashed potatoes, what could be better?
On that Monday, we were spending our first day away from each other in our new marriage.
The new Mrs. was home and I was at work, my first day back at the office as a young designer. At one point I called home and asked: “What’s for dinner tonight?” “Something Italian!” she cooed. AH! Sto mangiando stasera l'italiano! (I’m eating Italian tonight!)
I arrive home from work, the long day of work and the Long Island Rail Road plus the subway left me hungry. I am greeted at the door and I sit down to eat. There in front of me is a meat casserole, with red sauce over it. I’m anxious to eat, she cuts a slice and places it in my plate. I look at the dish and start to wonder what Italian cookbook she got this from?
“What’s the orange and white stuff in the middle of the slice?” I ask.
“Oh, that’s the leftover carrots and mashed potatoes!” Don’t laugh, it was delicious. After all these years she's still the best!


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