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Wednesday, February 15, 2017

AND YOU CAN LOOK IT UP!


For all baseball fans from the past, the phrase: "And you can look it up!" is immediately associated with the great Hall of Famer, Casey Stengel. He would throw out a statistic of some sort and end it with the phrase.

The other day I was watching TV and there was an interview with Alan Greenspan, former Chairman of the Federal Reserve. As we watched, I incorrectly noted that he was married to Lesley Stahl. TLW (The Little Woman) was surprised that he married anyone and immediately looked it up. Andrea Mitchell was the news reporter he did marry. She corrected me and added facts to the conversation. I, of course, apologized for the error and reminded her I am old, old people get mixed up. First, she was a woman, secondly, she was a reporter and thirdly, she was at the end of her career. TLW informed me she was 20 years his junior. I get points for the fact that both women are on or were on 60 Minutes, I think.

It seems now nothing is left to chance by TLW. Even my medications are scrutinized via the Internet to assess conditions, credibility, and knowledge about everything.

Fortunately, all the promises I made to TLW 46 years ago are not recorded anywhere on the Internet, she can't look it up, and hold it against me, she has to live with her mistake.

My Cardiologist increased a medication I am taking, and she immediately looked it up to tell me what that meant, how it would affect me and why. Me, I could care less, my feeling is that the doctor knows medicine, I know the contents of my refrigerator. I stay out of medicine and he stays out of my refrigerator. That's all I got, I'm retired and old, plus I get hungry a lot!

Way back in 1991, I purchased my first computer from Apple and invited her to use it. She refused, she wasn't getting involved in one of those new-fangled contraptions. But then I got her a laptop, and suddenly she started to learn, and went from a laptop to an Ipad and now, even an Android!

There is nothing she won't do with it, ordering on-line merchandise, air travel, and hotels, even looking up car sales. Once she finds out she can refurbish a husband, or replace him I will be a new man, totally void of my present charm, and will become someone likable, which hasn't happened since I learned to talk.

Pray for me.

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