NIGHTMARES DO COME TRUE

If you must be in the City of Angels do it in the day time with hours to find a parking space. A few nights ago I was invited to meet some friends from LA and a destination was decided on in the city. I was told that there were street parking and parking across the street and perhaps behind the building I was heading to.

From Burbank, the GPS gave me the mileage and predicted a time of arrival. LIARS!

After horrendous traffic and constant lights, I arrived at my destination carrying TLW (The Little Woman) and Bobby D in an infant seat. Thinking I had a parking spot practically next to the restaurant, #1 Son (Anthony) reminded me that I couldn’t park there because there was a red line painted on the edge of the curb, I had to move!

This is news I do not wish to hear in a strange neighborhood, in the dark, hungry. Slowly I pulled away from the curb as I left everyone off and started scanning the street for space. This was on a busy 6-lane street. I drove on to the next block and still no luck, so I decided to turn the corner and try again, maybe someone would have pulled out by now, but no, the bastards were still parked there.

Coming around once more I decided to try across the street, as by now with a lot of turning I was disoriented and frankly, lost. I drive down this road that is a side street with no lights, circle around a few corners and suddenly there on my right is this parking space! I check it out about three times to make sure there are no signs forbidding Long Islanders from parking there and no red painted lines to annoy me. I look around, park the car and start heading using Google on my cell phone to where I think I should. As I walk a while following Google my cell phone rings and it is #2 Son Mike. This immediately causes me to lose my map.

“Hey, Dad, where are you?”

“Well, I was on my way to the restaurant when my cell phone ended my Google map thanks to your call. THAT’s where I am.”

“Mom said you are heading the wrong way. Do you see a blue billboard?”

“Noooo…”

TLW gets on the phone.

“Joe, I saw you get out of your car but I tried to yell but you couldn’t hear me. GO THE OTHER WAY, and when you get to the corner across the street.”

After all the confusion, all the walking and anxiety, I had parked directly across the street!