Tomorrow I haul my tookus into Kielbasa land, home of the Polish fringe of the family. To insure my safe entry into the state, I will be taking the Polish Prince himself, my Brother-in-law, John.
If you know anything about Connecticut, just like Poland, if you try to enter without a kielbasa strung around your neck, they ask for a passport. If you have one on, they say: “OK, he’s one of us.”
We will be visiting my niece Jean-Marie, the only person I know of with her very own hyphen in the middle of her name! This is a Polish tradition that dates way back to the Tartars, trying to open a deli in Poland when Ivan-DaPerogie set up shop and sold his very first kielbasa.
The occasion will be a baptism of Jean-Marie’s newborn baby; Grace Lauren, or should it be Grace-Lauren? It will be a debut of sorts. Little Grace Lauren or should that be Grace-Lauren, into the family that harbors, Uncle Joe. (No, not Uncle-Joe). The child has a lifetime to get over it.
The family will be playing the Polish National Anthem; Buy Me A Pork Chop. (Family Joke)
There will be Nana, the matriarch of the Italian clan, and various aunts and uncles, both Polish and UnPolished. We will sit in the house and try to make conversation in Polish, or we will sit outside and try to figure out what we said, if it is Polish we were using inside. Heir to the throne of Polish Prince will be Tom, the honoree’s grandpa, and we will all learn the word for grandpa in Polish. (See photo) Also, we will be updated by Tom of the latest funny stuff from the internet, all with a Connecticut accent.
So the family is expanding in the true American fashion. Different nationalities have come to play and all are welcomed.
What we need is some Jewish humor and we can all feel good.
So pass the rye bowl dip, gimme sum chips and since there aren’t any Jews yet in the family, Mozeltov!
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