AWASHED IN PAIN

There is no greater pain than when you have something and it is gone, and you miss it. Yes, that is a truism in life’s cycle of good to bad things.

The other day I awoke thinking nothing was wrong, and little did I suspect. Sending The Little Woman (TLW) off to work, I went ahead with my usual chores, and filled the dishwasher and off I went to sign checks at the agency. This is my routine on some days.

Returning I discovered that the dishwasher wasn’t on, thinking how dumb I was to put soap in and not turn it on.

I turn it on.

Returning I discovered that the dishwasher wasn’t on!

I turn it on.

Returning I discovered that the dishwasher wasn’t on!

I turn it on.

Returning I discovered that the dishwasher wasn’t on!

OK, so there seems to be a pattern here, the MACHINE ISN’T WORKING!!!!!

I begin to wash by hand, all the dishes. Yes, every stinking dish, glass, cup, knife, fork and spoon by hand, just like Suzie spotless did it in the 1950’s.

One thing that always greeted me by surprise was phone calls from TLW when I worked telling me that something or someone died. My stock answer was call a repairman or send flowers. I call the repairman.

I get a young lady on the phone asking me the same questions about address, phone number and that included home and cell.

“How soon would you like to schedule an appointment?” she asked.

Oh, I don’t know, maybe right after I see the doctor for these chapped hands?

“As soon as possible.”

This is my standard stock answer when I call any repairman, just to see if they are interested.

“OK, we’ll have a repairman out there by 8:00 PM.”

“You will!!!???”

“Yes.”

“if you do, I will go tell all the neighbors about you. No, I will go further, I will break all their dishwashers and recommend you to fix them.”

“Wow” (this is the same silly goose if I wanted to schedule an appointment)

Help is on the way!