THERESA AND TEDDY

Many years ago, while I was still in high school, I had two part time jobs. Due to a school fire the previous year, my senior year was from 7:30 in the morning until early afternoon. From 2:30 to 4:30 every afternoon I worked for a factory that produced children’s play clothes for Sears Roebuck, and in the evening from 6 to 11:30 I worked for a supermarket chain called Hills Supermarkets.

Running the supermarket was a married couple. Teddy, the manager and Theresa as the assistant manager ran the supermarket with an iron fist. But what’s in a title? Theresa was the real manager of the operation, and Teddy followed orders, mainly hers. Momma assigned all delegation of duties, Momma determined all stocking decisions, and all and any decisions having to do with customers was a Momma thought too.

So what did Teddy do? Well Teddy decided what empty boxes were needed to be cut up, where a shelf was in disarray, Teddy fixed it, never asking anyone working on the floor to do it because Theresa would raise the roof and poor Teddy would get hell for disturbing her plan. Teddy was needed only for his authorized signature as a manager.

Theresa also had a pet and a whipping boy. Her pet was a blond stocky guy that was a real hustler, working hard day and night with aspirations to be an assistant manager someday, and then a manager. He never took breaks, stirred his coffee with the pencil that was constantly in his ear, rarely changed his clothes and annoyed the heck out of everyone else who worked at the supermarket.

Then there was the whipping boy. Arnold was a meek and courageous fellow, and courageous for the simple fact that he kept coming back for more. Arnold in his skinny body, with his black clip-on bow tie with white shirt and white apron was constantly being told what to do, getting hell for not doing it fast enough, and even had Teddy yell at him once. The problem with that was the Teddy was partially blind in one eye and though he was talking to someone else! Being a full-time student at Adelphi University, and not really caring about either Theresa or Teddy, Arnold had hopes and dreams of putting great distance between him and Hills once he graduated. Of course with the ambition that Arnold really had for his education, and the lack of interest in his Hills job did not dissuade him from working hard, and every hour he could find available. This chemistry that Arnold possessed, made Joey hate him, since Joey’s ambition was the supermarket.

Where did I fit in this menagerie? After each day, when I had finished rounding up baskets in the parking lot, in any kind of weather, or packing bags for nasty customers, I was put in charge of cleaning the toilets. It seemed that everyone had to do this job, until one day when Momma assigned me to the task. Being how I lived with my own Mother, I knew what a clean toilet looked and smelled like. Momma Theresa loved the job I did and she assigned it to me permanently! This was an easy job compared to loading the conveyer belt with heavy boxes, stacking them on skids and rolling them out for the night crew to stock the shelves with.

Well one evening as I was cleaning the toilets, revenge arrived in the form of Arnold. Theresa had a very thick German accent, with her blond hair and middle-aged body, thick glasses and unhappy demeanor yells out for Arnold. Poor Arnold is at the other end of the store, and goes running clear across stocked skids and working guys to answer Theresa’s call. “Arnold, give this to Joey and don’t vaste any time.” Arnold was clearly annoyed it was said and comes into the lady’s toilet where I’m working and looks for Joey. I tell Arnold that Joey is in touch with Mother Nature in one of the crappers in the men’s room, and seemed somewhat indisposed as his pants were down around his ankles. This was the first time I really saw Arnolds eyes light up, as he runs out of the lady’s room. As I’m putting the finishing touches on the sink in the Lady’s room, I hear Momma’s pet yelling as Arnold is leaving the Men’s room.

Poor Joey, he had to wade through a turned over bucket of sudsy water with very wet pants at his ankles by someone, right before that someone turned off the lights in the men’s room!