GRANDPA RALPH

“Rafiello” she called him, and when she did, he just groaned. He was a simple humble man, who knew no pretense, and enough sense to keep out of my grandmother’s way when she had something that needed to be done!

He was actually my Dad’s stepfather, having served in the US Army in World War I with my real grandfather, who had died from the Spanish Influenza! Grandpa Ralph, or “Grandpa” as we called him, married my grandmother, who was left with three children in a shack in Rockville Center, where dad was born.

He took on the mantle of fatherhood and with another child he had with my grandmother, raised them all as his own.

Having inherited two sons, he was quick to administer discipline, and it was usually ferocious. Some might say mean, but in the end, it all made some sense! Running the fruit and vegetable store that my grandmother owned, he expected the boys to help out. They would have to go down in the basement and sort the fruits and vegetables for the day ahead. That meant getting up before they went to school and even had breakfast to move the stuff up to the street level and sort it out for display every morning.

One morning, dad decided to eat some fruit before starting his day. Dad being young and foolish, ate too much of the unwashed plums, and soon it ran through him. ALL MORNING LONG! It was so bad, he couldn’t go to school, and when Grandpa got home from the market, found nothing done, and Dad incapacitated. Grandma was away, and Grandpa Ralph had returned from the Hunts Point market with his horse drawn wagon and ‘Ginger’ the dog.

Well old gramps asked Dad why nothing was done. Dad admitted he ate too much plum and got sick. Grandpa asked how he felt. Dad said much better. Grandpa said “good, go down stairs and finish up, when you do, come to me.” Dad was happy to follow orders in this case and did what he was told. “OK” said Grandpa Ralph, “Come with me”.

Down the steps Dad follow grandpa, to a pole. Grandpa tied Dad to the pole and said, the next time he was in a hurry to not do what he was told, to remember this little lesson. Dad was tied to the pole all the rest of the morning, and when Grandma came home, found my father tied, she was fit to be tied.

“Rafiello” she screamed, as Grandpa came running, forgetting he had tied dad up!

Grandpa Ralph taught Dad a lesson he never forgot, Grandma Frances taught Grandpa Ralph a lesson he never forgot, and when Grandma was done dispensing lessons in Italian, from the hot headed redhead she was, the whole family learned once again, don’t mess up the routine of life in a bad depression, everyone do his job with not only passion, but with compassion, too!