THAT GOVERNOR CHRISTY!

It was a crazy Saturday as I packed to leave for a wedding in New Jersey. TLW (The Little Woman) and I would drive to Edison and attend the wedding of my best friend Phil’s younger son Justin.

Having been out the night before at a Candlelight Ball, I was in no mood for breakfast when Saturday morning rolled along, so I decided to skip it. I would pay for this later!

That's me behind the blue truck

Around 12:15 as we were cruising along the NJ Turnpike, TLW decided that we should stop for lunch at the first rest stop that sold food. Not being a big fan of roadside stops, I look at the GPS and noticed it said we would arrive within 15 minutes in Edison, so I suggested we get there, then eat. That was mistake #2: I was on a roll without even knowing it!

Now I know some have accused Governor Christy of not being conservative enough but he is no liberal by any means, and that figures in to this story. We were now at our hotel, and since it was too early to check in, we though we would visit the hotel restaurant and have lunch there. Well wouldn’t you know it, they don’t serve lunch! We ask where to go for lunch, mistake #3! A waitress hanging around the hotel restaurant directs us to a diner, and we leave thinking it sounds easy enough to get to, (#4), and get back into the car.

We then begin our journey, getting on the highway searching for a place to eat, with one problem: the area does not allow left turns! That’s right, NO LEFT TURNS! As we drive along The Post Road, it is residential until you come to US 1, where it is a 8-lane highway that will not allow a left turn! By now it is 1:30 pm and I am getting a little mad, this governor wins re-election and you can’t even think ‘Left’ turn! We continue to drive and drive, until we decide we will make a right turn and try our luck, I get over to my right, and at a light make a right turn and discover I need to do this in order to make a left turn! These Right-wingers are making me crazy now!

Getting over the highway, we head back and finally find a restaurant where we have our lunch. Now we decide to check in at our hotel , not far from where we are. We have to go back, which means a left turn! No left turn means right turn, then it takes you to a light and you can cross over! It is 2:45, two and a quarter hours since we decided to stop for lunch, a simple task.

Getting back on the highway, we follow the GPS, which is taking us back past our hotel to an exit a mile away because we can’t make a left turn. That takes us to a toll gate where we pay getting onto the same highway that takes us around to the highway going the other way, with another toll!

The exit to the hotel is almost a quick a left merge as you can make, but what is in our way? Some guy is sitting in his car, blocking the exit because he is lost too! I swerve away form him and get back on the highway where once more I have to pay two tolls! Swearing at the poor guy as I drive by into the toll plaza, the GPS decides to take us another way. We find ourselves on a local street and after a number of right turns, finally arrive at our hotel at 3:00 pm.

Thank you Governor Christy!