IT DOESN’T GET ANY MORE CRAZIER

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As we sat in the Limo on our way to the funeral home for the last goodbye before the Mass, there was an issue. It seems Mom’s boy toy was acting a little strange once again and I decided that I didn’t want him at the funeral parlor.

It seems that Boy Toy had taken it upon himself to have flowers draped on my Mom’s casket, and a set of rosary beads placed in her hands. The funeral director told him he couldn’t place the roses on the coffin, but he would put the rosaries in her hand, and if the family decided that they didn’t want them he would remove them. The roses were a blanket for the top of the casket, and in the middle were two yellow roses that symbolized Mom and Boy Toy.

Most of the family disagreed with me and thought that even though he had abandoned Mom three times, throwing hissy fits and acting almost tyrannical, he should be allowed to come to the wake.

There even was divine intervention sought to see if I could change my mind. I was even told to “let it go”. As we drove the streets to get to the funeral parlor, there was a text message that Boy Toy was in the parking lot of the funeral home. Once again I was asked to “let it go”. Now in my grief I was angry and more determined than ever to keep him out.

Arriving at the funeral home, I exit the limo and see Boy Toy in his car, and I enter the building, I get the director and tell him I don’t want the man near the family: that I will personally toss him if he is let in.

Boy Toy stays in his car the whole time and we get back into the limo. Ready for the final ride to the cemetery.

My four sisters were in an odd mood. They were all being nervous silly, that is laughing and joking, something I usually do, one joke and one comeback after another. Little did they know that things were about to change in a hurry?

As we approached the cemetery, I noticed something strange.

TOMORROW: IT ALL BLOWS UP!