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Wednesday, March 18, 2015

NOW CUT THAT OUT!


Tried to call my lawyer the other day. The phone rang on the other end and the voice said: “Rabinowitz, Rabinowitz, and Rabinowitz, how may I help you?”

“I’d like to speak with Mr. Rabinowitz”.
“I’m sorry Mr. Rabinowitz is in a conference.”
“Then let me speak with Mr. Rabinowitz.”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Rabinowitz is on vacation.”
“May I speak with Mr. Rabinowitz.”
“Speaking.”

Everyday it seems I get these calls from companies trying to sell me insurance and credit cards and whatever. It has gotten to the point that I have resorted to picking up the call then hanging up. I do this because if I don’t the message machine picks up and the unsolicited caller leaves a message. That means that I have to go through the procedure of erasing the call, a pain in the butt! This way I do get the luxury of some revenge since they have to pay for the call since I picked up.

Sometimes when I feel evil, I will answer the phone and as they mispronounce my last name seeking me, I say: “Hold on, I’ll get him.” I place the phone down until I hear that they have hung up, this costs them a call and some precious time, which I waste on them, so why not make them waste some time too?

Sometimes if I feel vicious, I answer and pretend I’m interested, taking them through their paces and giving them phony information, it all depends how I feel, if they interrupted a call I was on or something I was doing, retaliation is necessary. Besides retaliation, it feels so good!

I know, Jesus would not approve, but Jesus has an unlisted phone number as far as I know, he doesn’t get phone calls from sales people.

The other day the phone rang and I did my usual, pickup then hang up. I looked at the caller ID and I recognized the number from the day before, and decided to call the number and give them either a piece of my mind or a phony order. I dialed the number and a recorded voice came on greeting me and asking me if I wish to stop receiving calls from them to press ‘1’ and the calls will cease in 48 hours! I thought this is a wonderful thing they are doing. 

Usually I get a call from different numbers from the same company: “This is Bridgett, and this is your second and final notice to lower your credit card rates” or some garbage like that. Once I took the call and they asked me how much I owed in credit card debt, so I told them $50,000 and without an explanation or goodbye they hung up on me!

TWBB&T Co., (The Wanna-Be Bank & Trust Company) has a woman who calls me just about everyday, checking up on me to ensure herself that the house is still standing, that I am still breathing and if there was any mail. I wonder if I called that number they would ask me to press ‘1’ to stop getting these calls? Only kidding.


 

  
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