Monday, April 06, 2015

IN LOVING MEMORY


No morning dawns, no night returns
that we don’t think of you.
Those left behind are very good
But none replaces you.
Many a silent tear is shed
When we are all alone
The one we love so very much
The one we call our own.

All too often I see and hear about parents that lose a child. In their sorrow they place little things before them to remind themselves that their child will not be forgotten, and so it is with me too.

In a little corner of my property sits a garden I built and dedicate to my son Joseph, who died too soon, not yet the age of 2-years. His death was a shock when it happened and in spite of all these past years it is still a shock. I don’t have this sorrow alone, no, I share it with his Mom and brother, who equally share the pain and loss.

Life is never fair, but it is full of fear. A play on words maybe, but truth is in the sentence. Once you feel the pain you always fear it. Every child that comes afterward you put more fear into yourself that the child will not be well.You ask yourself: Why me?

While we had him still on this Earth, we used to sing a particular song to him: ‘You Are My Sunshine’ and when we got to the part where you sing: ‘You make me happy when skies are grey’ he would smile, and so I sang that song often, just to catch his smile.

When he was born and we brought him home, had him Christened and celebrated his arrival with a party, we had no idea what was in store for us, and what shattered dreams would lay across our mental landscape, cluttering our paths and leaving us in such devastating pain.

Today is his birthday, I will go to visit his grave of over 34 years, then go to the little garden and sit for a while and just remember him. I will shudder over the event once more, and I will shed a tear or two I know, but I’m not ashamed of that, I miss him.

Somewhere in the Universe his spirit is alive, just as it is in my heart and mind, and somewhere in this Universe the sky is grey forever.

I thought I’d leave you with this:

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on”.


1 comment:

Corinne said...

God never sleeps and knows your pain! Remember he hears your prayers for sure. Can't imagine the loss of a child....just know that you will meet again someday! Corinne