GIVE ME A BREAK ALREADY

This morning I woke up alone, TLW (The Little Woman) being in Baltimore and went to brush my teeth. As I looked down, I noticed there were only two toothbrushes in the holder: #2 Son's and mine. It actually threw me off my stride, but I continued to wake up and get normal for the day.

I got dresses and went outside to get my newspaper, when I notice only one of the two I subscribe to be there. I checked again later and still no paper. I decided drastic action was called for, so I picked up the phone to complain.

“This telephone conversation will be recorded for quality assurance.” So said the voice at the other end. I fully expected a human to respond after that message, but instead heard an automated responder of some kind with a female voice. Although it sounded cheerful, I began to wonder if the “quality assurance” message was to see if I had a quality to my voice.

It asked me a bunch of questions, and I had to answer as instructed. At one point, it asked for my telephone number, and being how I was talking to a machine, slowly gave my number, distinctly and clearly, emphasizing the pronunciation of each number. There was a pause at the other end. “I’m sorry, will you repeat that number again like so” Then gave me a cadence and speed in which to say the number. A machine was correcting me! Bad enough TLW and little children correct, now a machine had to jump into the act.

After this humiliating course of events, it told me if all the business was done, to hang up. I said; “Thank you” to the machine that embarrassed me!

Wish you could hang up on this blog? Then write to: joedelbroccolo@yahoo.com, tell him: “Get the hell off the line, and stay off. I get better phone conversations when I get a busy signal!”