CALL ME MR. STIVIC

In life, there are triggers that once they go off, automatically bring back a memory. For me, there is one particular trigger I love to pull. It is watching: ALL IN THE FAMILY!

The show was extremely popular and cutting edge in 1971. Everyone watched and everyone commented on it. It was a show that spoke volumes about America’s attitudes in regards to each other, the political scene and the whole world at large.

In 1971, TLW (The Little Woman) and I were married. Prior to our marriage she decided I needed to visit her family. Not just Mom and Pop, but all her aunts and uncles and any cousins that might be around.

One Saturday evening, in the early spring before the wedding, out we went for I think a St. Patrick’s get together for her family in Queens. It was Norman Lear’s set! Queens style duplexes, filled with in this case: Irishmen, gathered together to party. There was her Aunt Mary, and her Uncle Eddie, along with her aunt Connie and Uncle Mike, plus a whole slew of others I can’t remember. They sat on the set of what seemed to me to be the All In The Family studio, waiting for their cue to start the show! They dressed like Archie and Edith, and I felt like the “Meathead” (Hey, I heard that!) sitting amidst the clan of Irish working class people.

They greeted me kindly, probably wondering what TLW saw in me, and I just assumed a low profile. Grabbing a scotch and soda that was offered to me, I sat and observed.

If you ever sat with a truckload of Irishmen, you are lucky. They get that twinkle in their eyes and a lilt in their voices after a few drinks. But, they always smile, laugh and joke, and their eyes scan the room for concurring views.

This night, Uncle Eddie, who was a Jonathan Winters look alike in girth and height, had his accordion out, and was serenading Mary, his pretty wife. As he sung and played: ‘Mary’ tears were streaming down his face, love was in his heart, and the whole room of Irishmen was becoming melancholy. Maybe it was the scotch and soda, maybe it was the tears, or maybe just the music, but I left that night knowing I had a good thing about to happen to me!

My mother-in-law, Helen, was the real Edith Bunker. I think Norman Lear modeled Edith after Helen Manning. She was the sweetest lady I ever met. She always had a smile on her face, an opened heart, and a wonderful sense of honesty. She could get down to the level of a child and make him feel important, but she soared over many an adult I ever knew.

Dad, or Jim as he was known, never really erupted until he was in a party. There he would have his little whisky and start to make people laugh. He was a very serious person, a hard working Irishman who feared God and Helen, and maybe not in that order!

But every time I hear the music intro for All In The Family, I am taken back to a wonderful period in my life. I had a great gal for a bride, a great career before me, and would not change a moment in time from those days.