DelBloggolo: I’M ON SUICIDE WATCH

Monday, October 13, 2014

I’M ON SUICIDE WATCH

Every Sunday during the fall and early winter, I sit in front of my TV in my den and watch something so vile and disgusting that I am now resorting to thoughts of suicide.

Upon entering the den at usually 1:00 pm, I remove my belt, shoelaces and any sharp instruments and lock them away giving TLW (The Little Woman) the key to hide from me. I then instruct her that no matter what, no matter how violent I get, or what I say, do not and I mean DO NOT under any circumstances give in to me.

The HEAD coach

It seems that Sunday after Sunday, I subject myself to this same horror and don’t learn, hearing a voice in my head say: “Joe, let it go!” Of course I speak of the New Jersey Jets, and they should stay there.

Of course I can translate the Jets experience into baseball or basketball and certainly hockey: it all ends the same. My teams all take it on the chin, and so dreams of championship dance in my head and run in the gutter.

Since January of 1969 when the then New York Jets won Super Bowl III, my hopes have been dashed. Had I known this would have happened I would have tried to wean myself off of football and resorted to listening to some author on TV in some obscure TV channel talk about his book, a book I probably never read and never will! I could have even watched a cooking show or worst still, some shopping channel or religious talk. (All denominations are welcomed)

I think at my age, (The other side of 39) whimpering and sobbing, cursing and swearing, crying and screaming at a TV is not good behavior for a newly minted grandfather, it is not really who I am and not what I wish to project as a grandfather.

I have tried to watch with the sound off and no closed captioning, with others to take my mind off the events as they unfold, but it is of no use, and then I replay them all evening and into the early morning hours, where I rise, get a newspaper and read about it, while watching the news give it to me again and again on the CBS Early Morning News.

Maybe I will just punt and quietly go away.