I MUST BE NUTS

For the last few years I thought I had a compulsive disorder where everything has to be a certain way. The pictures have to hang next to each other at exact distances, towels folded a certain way, tables set exact.

This morning I was putting toothpaste on my toothbrush and spent time getting that little swirl to work at the end of the paste, so it would stand up and look good. It hit me! It’s not a compulsive disorder, but I was still being an art director! Yes, I was getting ready for studio shoots! What is wrong with me? I thought I retired?

I set the table to eat and all the napkins have to face a certain way, all the arrangement of knives and forks must be so, if there are spoons, they must be perpendicular to the rest of the stuff.

You should see my sandwiches. If there is lettuce and tomato involved, it must be where the lettuce hangs out of the bread only a little, while the tomato sits at 3/16 of an inch and red. The meat must have a certain fold to look appetizing, but my one concession is cheese, lots of it. (Coming from a long line of rats, I like cheese.)
Only kidding.

I confirmed my suspicion by the fact that my office at work where ever it was, was always neat and everything was put away. Yet my studio at home is a mess usually. Now I’ve been straightening it up too.

Now if you will excuse me, I would like to fix my keyboard so it is centered like it should be, maybe a sheet of paper can hang from the clipboard and, Oh, I’ll need a pencil to lay across the paper.

About the only thing left in my life is my messy car, not that it is really messy, I just haven’t had it at the car wash in a while and I need the ice scraper to clean the windshield and it’s 70 degrees out!

I wonder if Monk is a repeat?