SAY AAAHHHHOOWWW!

Today is a bad day. Today I have to sit in the dentist chair and open my mouth for an hour.

What will I say? Nothing!

Root canal.

Can you say root canal, boys and girls?

Not while you’re having it.

Being a married man, opening my mouth is a lost art. Having something to say is forever gone! Every wife’s dream is to have her husband with his mouth opened and nothing to say. And he better not!

TLW (The Little Woman) said I should get in touch with my cardiologist and tell him about the root canal because according to her, I have a leaky valve in my heart. (It’s my dog, not me.)

Now I have a wonderful Sicilian Sister In-Law (SSIL) aka Angela. SSIL is very thoughtful, and has demonstrated that in the past time after time. Yesterday she sent me an entire article in the Washington Post about shoulder pain and the theory of the author that the computer mouse causes it!

Yesterday I got the results of some x-rays I had taken on my right shoulder. Let me explain it to you the way they explained it to me.

1. Moderate glenohumeral osteoarthritis.
2. Suspected calcific tendinopathy at supraspinatus tendon insertion.

What does all that mean? It means that it hurts in the right shoulder, I’m getting old, to shut up and take an aspirin and go get the root canal. It also means I have to go to an orthopedic surgeon next week.

Then I have to go home and pack for Albany. Yes, after the heat and humidity of Florida, I go to Albany and the cold. It will probably snow, my root canal will hurt, as will my shoulder, and I will go home to hope. That is, a bottle of Jack Daniels and a bottle of sweet vermouth, that I will skillfully mix and drown my sorrows. I won’t get drunk, Ma.

Please remember my good buddies Joan and Anita.