THE WANNA-BE BANK AND TRUSS COMPANY

The other day, I decided to go to the Wanna-Be Bank and Truss Company to cash in some coins I had saved over the past few months. Their Motto is: Like TLW (The Little Woman), your money is our concern!”

Arriving at the parking lot, a sudden feeling of being watched ascended, as I felt somewhat like I was visiting Fort Knox. The building itself is somewhat new, with the latest technology, and is a very pleasant place to pretend you are banking.

One other point should be noted here, it is the playground of TLW, where she works and eats lunch. (The latter, mostly) It seems every time I call, someone tells me she is out to lunch!

Entering the place, I go to my right and find two coin machines, where one can deposit loose change, and a receipt prints out how much is put into it, and redeemed by a teller.

In the process of emptying the container of coins, suddenly standing next to me as I am looking down at the floor for any coins that I may have dropped is a pair of familiar shoes. I realized I didn’t wear black straps on my shoes with high heels! I look up, and there stands TLW!

“Where did all that come from?”

“Huh?!”

“All that money! Need help?” (What did she mean?)

“Help? Me? No, I don’t need help.”

Suddenly the coin machine is not recognizing all the coins. This is playing into her hands! I wonder how much I’ll see after it is all said and done counting.

“You shouldn’t be so nervous, here… let me HELP you.”

Reaching into a small space she retrieves all the coin and throws it into the machine next to it. The machine is counting upwards of $150! She prints out a receipt or two and says: “Come with me.” I follow; after all she does have my receipts!

My original plan was to deposit the coins, go to the teller and get my money and run. We march to her desk where she sits down. As I enter I wave to all her ‘buddies in currency’ and sit. She is writing something on a small slip of paper. Reaching for the tube (I wonder how those things turn corners?) she deposits the receipts and the small slip of paper into the tube and off it goes. I’m thinking the note says: “Teller, send me back half the cash, and meet me in the parking lot after work, we split the rest 60-40!”

Actually, TLW IS very honest, but when it comes to money, I’m a nervous type, having never seen any since June 19th, 1971!