PARTING

Today I’d like to share with you one of my life experiences. It is about a great lady I know, who has made any happiness in my life possible.

Many years ago, while I was in college, I was struggling to get through, my marks were great, but my ability to hang on wasn’t. I was rising at 4:00 am and getting on the train at Bellport on the south shore about 5:00 am to go to Jamaica NY, to switch to another line and take that back on the north shore. When classes were over, I reversed the routine, then went to a job and worked until 11:00 pm at Hill’s Supermarket, came home did homework and went to sleep only to start the next day the same. Dad had no money to give me to pay for college or anything that went with it: we were poor.

I would go to school all day but arriving at Westbury, getting off and hitchhiking to the campus, and if I didn’t get a ride, I walked! I would spend my day, sometimes with nothing to eat, sometimes a sandwich. Getting on the train I would hide in the rest room until the trainman passed then find a seat, because I had no money for the fare. I know it was wrong, I feel guilty about it, but I didn’t hurt anyone, and that was the extent of my criminal activity. I had to pay for my tuition, books and art supplies plus film for my photography classes.

One Sunday my aunt Marie: my Mom’s baby sister came for a visit, and asked me about what was going on in my life. When I got around to my travels and how I did them, she immediately insisted that I come stay with her, which was near the college. For her good graces and those of her wonderful husband Frank, my mentor and perhaps one of the real heroes I had as a kid, I managed to stay in college and get my degree, which paid out for years to come.

She gave me a place to sleep, three meals a day, and a place to work and do my homework, no charge! Carrying 21 to 24 credits a semester, I studied not only design, but also business courses, English lit and math and science. The work was hard enough as it was, but I needed an education, and I needed to have a better life than my Dad’s. He came from immigrants and never had the opportunity during a depression to go to college, but he was excited about my going, even if he couldn’t help me.

Aunt Marie made it possible for me to get through the most difficult time in my life, and because I got through I met my wife and had my family and did the things I did do, because she had the compassion to see to it that her nephew persevere.

She died last night. In her early 90’s she is breathed her last breath. She knew she was dying, but I know her spirit is still very much alive. She lived alone, he only son died tragically many years ago in the early 70’s. She has an adopted son, Billy who struggled mightily to give her comfort and be with her in her passing. He is a wonderful so, and good person.

When I was a child growing up in Brooklyn, Aunt Marie would come in the morning, while Mom was busy cleaning and make her mark. She was a card as they say. Mom would have a radio on with Arthur Godfrey hosting, and Aunt Marie would switch old Arthur off so she could chat. I would hate to see her. She would call over her 4 year old nephew and check behind my ears, to see if they were clean, EVERY MORNING! As a little girl, Aunt Marie would make my grandmother stand and place her hand on her heart when they played the National Anthem on the radio first thing in the morning!

She was a shopper, dragging Mom down to Piken Avenue or Broadway and walking my 4 year old legs off, as she and Mom pushed their baby carriages and chatted, while looking into the store windows and on occasion, stopping to barter.

She had a spot in her eye, on her retina and when I would looked at it I was amazed by it and like all the kids: ask if it hurt. Aunt Marie was probably one of the most beautiful women I have ever met, she was a stunner, a looker, and she never knew it.When Christmas came around, I would send her a card addressed to "Marietta" her real name, one she hated to hear. She would always say: "When I get my hands on my rotten nephew I'm going to kill him!" then she would laugh.

When Uncle Frank and Aunt Marie got older, they moved to Boca Raton Florida to spend their retirement years. After Uncle Frank died, she took on a newspaper route in her building to keep busy. She would deliver the newspapers and chat with her elderly friends and neighbors, them would take her walker and walk a great deal, at least a mile and a half to the local supermarket to shop, getting out of the house and shopping were her life.

There are so many things I could say about her; so many wonderful memories that I cherish that will keep her alive in my heart. I tried to call her at least every two weeks and check on her, and as she suffered osteoporosis, I would ask: “How you doing, how are you feeling?” She would always say: “Well a little pain, but I make the best of it, you know, you can’t complain, so you make the best of it.”

Nothing held her down, and this won’t either, she will live in my heart until I die.