YOU HAVE NOTHING TO FEAR, BUT FEAR ITSELF!

She stood over it, shaking like a leaf! Realizing what had happened overnight in the kitchen, she retreated into the den and found some newspapers in the early morning hours. Slowly unfolding yesterday’s news, she returned to the kitchen and with the papers opened, aimed for the center, hoping to make it in one shot, without having to do it over again because she missed.

Leaning at a 45-degree angle, she softly tossed the papers and waited for the results. She took a deep breath and sighed, for she had missed. Working up enough courage, she leaned in and snatched the papers for another try, and if she did not succeed, she would call her companion for 40 years to help in this crisis situation. This time she vowed NOT to miss. With all the courage she could muster, she made one more attempt. RIGHT ON TARGET!

As I descended the steps for my morning coffee, I met her at the base of the steps. She said nothing, but I knew. I knew by the look in her haunted eyes, the sense that my dastardly act had achieved what I hoped it would. I had no guilt, I felt it was time to take measures and ensure the peace and tranquility of my humble abode.

#2 Son had alerted us, had even tried to take matters in his own hands. But this was a job for a seasoned pro! No young whippersnapper could handle this job. It took me back to my salad days, when we lived alone, just the two of us, in a small cramped apartment. In those days, this was a common occurrence, so I knew only I could handle it.

“Wow! I see my little plan worked!”
TLW (The Little Woman): “Yes, when I woke up this morning and came down, it was there. I didn’t want to touch it, its behind was sticking out of the trap!”
“Well all you had to do is pick up the trap and dump him in the garbage can. Go ahead, it’s easy enough.”
TLW: “NO! You do it.”

Pepino the little mouse was dead all right, his tail sticking, stiffly out of the trap. I picked up the trap and went outside with it and dumped little Pepino in the can, scheduled to take a ride on Friday’s garbage truck!