BEING A GENIUS

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Sometimes I have to live with myself and it ain’t pretty!

For instance, after the last storm, the neighborhood was a mess from Sandy passing by. All my neighbors were out cleaning up the debris and clearing their property off from the fallen leaves and branches from the wind.

I noticed that some of my neighbors were using their blowers to clear their property and I thought I’d do the same, and so I went into the garage and took down my

 leaf blower. I usually need two sets of extension cords and so I connected one to the other and then into the garage wall, making sure the wires were knotted together so they don’t pull apart. I hadn’t used it in years since I now use a lawn service to do all that nonsense.

Well I was plugged in, knotted and ready. I push the button and nothing happens. “Darn” I think: “the blower must be so old and not used for so long a time, it won’t work!” So in disgust I take everything apart and put it back where it belongs.

I go into the house and tell TLW (The Little Woman) that; we need a new blower, the old thing doesn’t work! She starts to look at me with a funny look on her face, and I wonder what her problem is.

“I gave it my best shot, it won’t start!” I plead.

“You know it runs on electricity.”

She said that in front of one of our lit candles that she needed to read, since we lost our power.

“Oops!” (This is the best I could say.)

I go back into the kitchen and I notice my cell phone is low on the charge and I reach for the wire to plug it into my phone.

“DON’T YOU DARE TRY TO CHARGE THAT PHONE!!!” she ordered.

“Oh! Yeah, no power!” (This is the best I could say.)

Stupid is what stupid does, and I can prove that theory.

It is bad enough that all through the power outage, every time I went into the toilet, I would automatically switch on the light with no results, that when we finally had the power restored I didn’t bother to switch on the light for a while.