ON A ROLL

Thanksgiving morning, reading about Hurricane Sandy and the disruption of service that it caused for the utility LIPA, and the statement that the Governor made that it must go for something better, I thought that the lighting company was long over due for a shakeup.

Just then TLW (The Little Woman) asked if I would go to the local convenience store and get a couple of buttered rolls. The rolls are buttered fresh, then put into waxed paper sandwich bags and tapped closed and put in a wicker basket, and you go and take as many as you need. They sell for $1.09 each or two for $2.17. (8½ cents sales tax)

I pay for two and off I go back home and to TLW. I sit in my easy chair with a cup of coffee and open my roll, THERE IS NO BUTTER ON IT!

“THERE’S NO BUTTER ON MY ROLL!” I yell.

“Well, I have butter on mine.” Says TLW. (Thank you very much!)

I fume and decide to go back and confront the convenience store since this is not the first time this has happened.

In my car I go and drive down the block, and start to think: “These poor people have to work this morning on a holiday, and here I am about to make a fuss about a lousy stinking roll!” However, I drive on to the store.

Arriving at the parking lot, I jump out of my car and head into the store, where the owner is standing, and he sees me with the roll in my hand, the kid who was suppose to butter them next to him.

“Uh oh, what did he forget this time?” says the owner.

Calmly I state my case: “There is no butter on my roll” and I show the evidence.

The owner takes the roll from me and I continue.

“This has happened more than once, and I’m thinking of having the governor come to investigate, maybe shut down this whole buttered roll business, maybe appoint a new commissioner of buttered rolls here! DO YOU WANT THAT?”

Well he gave me a new roll and allowed me to inspect it first. Of course he had a big grin on his face and so did I, but he IS lucky I didn’t charge him for the extra gas the trip cost me.