WAITING FOR THE BIG SHOW

Ed Sullivan: that host with the most on Sunday evenings, used to open his show saying: “Tonight we have a really big shoe.” It was the most imitated line for comedians and jokesters and became part of the American lexicon.

Recently I put on the TV to hear the weather report. The report was filled with doomsday predictions, of flash flooding, and torrential rains. The only thing missing was the prediction of the second coming of Jesus or the Messiah, depending on where you pray. They were reporting a coming of a really big show!

Being how I have a new lawn that needs watering, I hesitate to overwater if it is going to rain, so I decided not to. Looking into my pool, I noticed that the water level at the skimmers was low also and decided not to add any since I would be pumping some out when the deluge comes.

I have been waiting all day now, and still not a drop. I know if I do any of the above, it will sure as Hell rain. If I don’t do it, it won’t rain.

My bills, I don’t have to wait, aches and pains: no lines, no waiting, but the rain: I’m still waiting for the rain.

I get a kick out of these newscasters that report the weather. You’d think there was a war going on locally, with all the radar and excited yelling about what is coming. They give you the highs and the lows, the wind speed and the barometric pressure, JUST TELL ME WHEN THE HELL IT WILL RAIN! I’m really not a fancy man, I don’t need all that information, just simply, it’s gonna rain, or snow and not. Since when do I retain the other stuff? If you heard the last weather forecast, do you remember all those numbers? No you don’t.

Even the pollen count has become important as something to report on, and if you have hay fever, what will you do about it anyway??? They report they have “Doppler Radar” BIG FRIGGIN DEAL! Who cares, my joints do a better job anyway!

Now Dear Reader, it is time for you to settle down, relax and don’t get so excited, you make Mr. DelBloggolo upset too.

Actually, I love the rain: love a good old thunder storm as long as I’m not in it. I sometimes open my garage door, sit on a lawn chair and watch the heavy rain. If I have someone to talk to, we get nostalgic or talk baseball or football, a beer maybe or eve a cup of coffee. If you see one of those days coming, come on over and we can sit in the garage with the door open and watch it all happen, it usually is a really big show.