LIVING WITH MY MISTAKES

One would think after a few times of making the same mistake, not to do it again!

The atmosphere was festive, we had just wandered into the dining room for the big dinner, as the other 500 guest were doing. The table was large and round, like all tables one finds at these functions. Set for a very formal occasion, TLW (The Little Woman) was leading me and we selected our seats without thinking.

You may wonder: What’s to think about? Just sit down DelBloggolo!

That was my mistake too. TLW sat and I sat on her right. The old problem came up once again. TLW is a lefty, a southpaw, she marches to the tune of a different drummer, and happens to be married to someone who could get lost in an empty room, and needs directions on how to get out of his driveway.

It seemed that the setting were too close for comfort, as they tried to fit more people on each table than was wise. That’s when the trouble started.

With her left hand TLW reaches for the napkin. She then proceeds to place it on here lap.

“That’s not your napkin you have there!”

“NO, THAT’S your napkin pointing to her right.”

“You sure!?”

“Yes, that’s how things get screwed up.”

“OK”

People started to arrive at our assigned table and picked up their napkins and started placing them on their laps. Suddenly we are all placed, water is poured and TLW takes a few sips and by now we are all seated. We make our self introductions and I suddenly notice, the guy on my right has a napkin on his lap and a glass of water. TLW has her stuff and I am wondering what the hell happened! I have two napkins, and two glasses of water!

A waiter comes over to the table, leans in to hear what a woman across from us is saying, and looks perplexed. He leaves and comes back with a water glass and napkin.

I’m thinking to myself: “All this water! If there is a small fire on my plate, I have the resources to fight it!”

My fellow Americans, if you look at the place setting, you will see how I screwed up!