Sunday, March 23, 2014

DR. STRANGEGLOVE


As you know, I ranted on about having to get a shot before TLW (The Little Woman) and I fly out to California and meet our new granddaughter.

So we arranged for the shot with Dr. Strangeglove, who is not one of those doctors that gets all excited so much about medicine as he is about Obamacare and the evils that he feels lurks thereof.

Since TLW and I were getting the same shot for Potassium, Dyslexia, and Trigonometry, (they now combine these shots into one) it would be a simple case of stick out your arms shoot. You would think.

Pia, the nurse starts the ball rolling by asking me to go leave a urine specimen in a cup. Now what they do with I don’t know, I have given it to them every time I visit the doctor. You’d think they’d save for the next visit, just put it in a jar and make sure you close the top real tight. But no, once again I go into the tiny closet like toilet with a Dixie cup in hand and bring it into the examining room.

As TLW does her part, I head back into the examining room and place the cup, Pia sticks me with a thermometer and gets my temperature.

“Hmmm… are you a diabetic?”
“Uh huh.” (Damned, if she isn’t about to give me trouble, make me take some test and see a specialist and come back in two weeks for the shot because being a Pia, this will make me nuts and that is what she is best at!)

“Maybe I’ll alert the doctor, it’s not too bad, but just in case I’ll tell the doctor.” Says Pia.

In pops Dr. Strangeglove, all happy that no one is lounging in his waiting room since it is on this rare occasion empty!

Big mouth tells him about the read on the urine strip, which is a lot like the test strips I use to check the pool water at home. I almost expect him to say I need shock and have to up my alkaline balance after I get skimmed in the wallet. To make matters worse, he is questioning TLW and a blood pressure pill her doctor prescribes, making this visit complicated and making me antsie. Will we have to delay the shots and maybe NOT get to see my granddaughter? This is troubling.

He has his needles ready and sticks me first, then discussed my blood pressure then TLW’s medication and as I jump off the table I tell him to now shoot my wife. (She has it coming, she made this appointment).

So while he is about to give TLW the needle, something I am loath to do since she doesn’t think I’m funny in the least bit, he asks me if I strayed off my ‘diet’ in which I respond: “Diet, what diet?” and orders Pia to stick me with a lance to draw blood and read the sugar level. Fortunately he doesn’t start calling me Mr. Domino because my sugar level is not all that bad, just a glich. He shoots TLW and we are home free!

So soon I will meet my newly minted and beautiful granddaughter, beautiful daughter-in-law and #1 Son in sunny California, what could be better?

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