WHERE ARE THE DVD's?

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La Principessa!

Since I am scheduled to go out to California and see La Principessa, my beautiful granddaughter Darby Shea, I need certain things to be just right. One of them is my health and a 6 –hour flight to Burbank can make me cranky, and I don’t wish to infect that gorgeously beautiful child with ANYTHING other than smiles.

Having a respiratory infection is troubling, so I decided to go to the walk-in clinic to get immediate action and not waste any time with my doctor who won’t have time for a day or two later. That is too long: I need to start immediately if not sooner in ridding myself of the nonsense.

There is a place nearby called STAT Health, and walk in, fill out 12 forms, and when you are done filling them out, signing them, repeating the same answers over and aver again, you walk out feeling better just from all that time spent!

It started out earlier in the morning before TLW (The Little Woman) went off to work, asking how I felt and stating that she thought I should go to a walk-n in clinic to get some help. I wondered if there is a walk-in psychiatric clinic then realized what she really meant.

Former Blockbuster Video local

The place used to be a Blockbuster Video and when they went out of business, turned it into a Blockbuster forms and walk-in clinic for impatient out-patient health care. That is where I came in, as a patient. On my way to purchasing a roll for my coffee, I thought I’d drop by and see what time they open their doors, and arriving at 8:04 am, noticed that the hours started at 8:00 am. I was already 4 minutes late for my forms!

I enter the place, the receptionist takes my driver’s license and medical card and hands me the dreaded clipboard. I need two hands to hold it; it is so heavy with forms! “Have you been here before?” she asks. “Yes to rented a movie a few times, I like what you did to the place!” She reaches for more forms and gives them to me. I am quickly learning not to open my mouth. I go sit down and add back and tosh pain to my list of ailments.

Not one DVD in sight!

As the sun is about to set, I hand in the forms and another woman calls me in to see the doctor. Her questions are timely as she struggles with the blood pressure wrap around the arm and I answer what I already answered in at least triplet on the forms once again. I am the first patient of the day, and the woman says the doctor will see me soon. Soon is a relative word. If measured by years, soon could mean a month or two. Measured in hours, it could mean 59 minutes or less. I wonder if I am the first patient of the day, why isn’t the doctor on the heels of the woman? Are there still patients left over from the day before filling out forms?

Finally the doctor’s mother walks in the doctor by the hand, and he asks me the questions that the woman asked that I answered in triplet on the forms. Then the question I wasn’t expecting to hear comes out his mouth: “What are you here for?” My inclination was to tell him I wanted to rent a movie, but instead decided to be nice and tell him what I put on the forms in triplet, told and woman and now state once again.

I'll see you in California-maybe

The good doctor, not quite an adolescent yet screws up his nose and asks: “What do you think it could be?” I like that in doctors, they ask very pertinent questions, take Dr. Strangeglove, my regular physician who when he finally shows up asks: “How are you today?” Well Doctor, I was feeling so good today I decided to spend some time contemplating life, or what’s left of mine in your various waiting rooms. Little Junior listens to my heart, checks my throat and ears (thankfully one at a time) and suggests that it might be viral or it might be bacterial, or it might be something else. I show him my palms and tell him I have rashes in both palms and have been applying ointment: a cortisone to prevent itch, which is finally abating. Looking at them he says: “Oh! Yes, it could be viral!” I’m afraid he will run away leaving me with my palms outstretched! That would complete the picture.

Junior runs into the next room telling me he will prescribe something with complete printout instructions on what to do. I marvel at his efficiency, and at such a young age! I will go to the drug store, get the medicine and hope he didn’t prescribe my demise, I was hoping to leave that to TLW,