Wednesday, February 18, 2015

IT’S SO COLD…

It’s so cold: the Statue of Liberty has the torch under her skirt!

Now that’s cold!

Dear Al Gore:

Being you were once Vice President of the United States, you should know better than anyone about fibbing, but shame on you for doing just that. Now you look like a nice enough chap but then so does Brian Williams. As Lying Williams will tell you, it ain’t worth it. What am I talking about? I’ll tell you.

No, it is not about inventing the Internet, although Mr. Williams may have put in a claim about that too, or at least claimed to be there when it happened, no, I’m talking about global warming. As I am typing this, it is about -2 degrees Fahrenheit and the wind is not only blowing, it is howling out there! It strikes me that you made this Global Warming all up, and that is why you will never be more than Vice President and NOT President!

I haven’t seen any signs of global warming, just a lot of ass freezing and mine in particular. If it were true, don’t you think I’d notice that today? There are more cracks in my butt from the ice than I originally had by birth! You talk about emissions and what not, that carbon dioxide CO2 is oozing everywhere, from trucks, chimneys and anyone over 65, but be that as it may, where’s the heat? All I see when I look out my window is snow, under more snow that covers the ice that global warming never got to?

You and your lackeys claim it is from using energy, that every time we burn coal or fossil fuels, we burn up energy and that causes global warming. EVERY TIME WE BURN ENERGY, IT IS BECAUSE WE ARE COLD AND AS WE SHIVER, WAITING FOR THE GLOBE TO HEAT UP, WE SHIVER SOME MORE, THUS EXPENDING MORE ENERGY!!!

I don’t know, maybe Democrats feel the heat more than Republicans or Liberals more than Conservatives, but us Independents are freezing off our collective independence and relying on fossil fuels to heat us up, and you better be careful you old fossil, because you may be next.

And here's the other amazing thing: there are no visible emissions from the tons and tons of fossil fuels you claim we are burning every day. You say we can see the impact of mining, oil exploration and coal barges pulling up to power plants, but we can't see what's coming out of our tailpipes, chimneys and smokestacks. Maybe it’s not there? Hmmm? You say it's because CO2 is crystal clear. Yup, it's completely, utterly, totally invisible! We generate millions of tons of it each day and yet we don't SEE it! Maybe you should go back to taking your meds, and wear a coat.

Thank you,
The Editorial Staff of DelBloggolo




  
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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Let's put that in other words....global warming my a--! Yes, the weather is changing, and someday, as we have been noticing over the years, we will "keep" the "nicer" weather. The old timers have been saying this for 100 years, (and we didn't have any cars emissions, or garbage dumps burning off the " non recyclables ", etc.) Weather all over the world has been changing gradually since the beginning of time. Our "global warming" is a ploy to raise oil prices in the winter, and electric in the summer for the air conditioners., pool filters, basically anything you can plug in!!!! So Florida, Hawaii, don't throw those coats out yet! :-)

Avid reader said...

We agree. The summers years ago seemed to be much hotter, EVERY day, than they are now. Now, maybe a week or 2 of "extreme" heat.