Every now and then I get an email from the crooks over in Nigeria. We have been carrying on correspondence for quite a while. They know me as Algonquin J. Calhoun. If you remember an old Amos ‘N Andy show back in the 50’s and 60’s, Algonquin J. Calhoun was a crooked lawyer.
The morons I deal with think A.J.C. is a real person, and I try to maintain the myth. This is the most recent correspondence I received, and my reply. Notice the spelling and grammar, let alone the professionalism.
“Dear Algonquin J. Calhoun,
Consequent upon the fact that our fund has been -re-approved based on my effort and series of application for extension of date,please be advised, that it will be cancelled after this final deadline issued by the government which will expire on the 15th because of the X-Mass holiday,i urge you to expedte action and assist with the little fee part payment to avoid the cancellation.
Remember,to re-send your banking details for authentication/validation to avoid wrong transfer of fund and i equally awaits your fee details for my completion of the balance and release of our fund directly into your account without stoppage since international clearance documents has been secured. Please, note that as soon as we pay this last fee,our fund must be wired directly into your account without any delay or hidden fee as guaranteed by the government irrevocably.
Please, call me on phone: 234-7037375079.
Regards,
Mr. Stanley Lawson.”
My reply:
“Dear Mr. Lawson,
You have my authorization to take the fee and a small 1% commission for yourself, from the funds being transferred.
A. J. Calhoun”
You notice, I don't give them the information, just frustration. They keep trying, and I keep stringing them along!
3 comments:
Atta boy Joe, Calhoun would be proud. We hereby elect you an honorary member of the Mystic Knights of the Sea lodge, George "Kingfish" Stevens presiding.
I haven't laughed that hard in quite awhile! Too, too, funny!
Your way younger sister Fran
nice post. thanks.
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