Saturday, October 09, 2010

AN APPOINTMENT FOR HELL

Or, the hell with it!


It seems that my teeth are giving me a little problem, so I figured I go to the dentist, where they can practice their black magic on me.

Picking up the phone to make an appointment at 1:00 pm, it rings about 20 times before someone casually answers it.



“HELLLOOOO, Sachem Dental, can I help you?”
Me: “Yes, I need to make an appointment with Dr. Mazzola.”
“Why are you calling?”
Me: “I just said, I need to make an appointment with Dr. Mazzola!”
“Are you a patient of Sachem Dental Group?”
Me: “Yes, that’s why I’m calling you.”
“Have you ever been here before?”
Me: “uh… Yes, I have.”
“And what’s the problem?”
Me: “I need a little work.”
“I have to check the roster to see first if you are a patient, please hold on.”



I have a strong suspicion at this point that the wait is going to be long, because the recorded message is telling me that it understands there is apprehension when going there, so for my consideration, there is a nice relaxing waiting room, with a very loud TV, and where the little bastards run around screaming to heighten my waiting pleasure! Then he begins the first chapter of War and Peace.

We are half way into the book when the gal gets back on the phone.

“Okaaay, you ARE on our roster. Now let’s see when we can fit you in.”
Me: “I can’t make it on Monday, Thursday or Friday next week, but Tuesday and Wednesday are good.”
“Hmmmm, let’s see, let me check the calendar, can you hold on a sec, and enjoy the rest of the book.”

There is a very long pause, as now I’m in my robe, and ready for bed.

“Okaaay, we can fit you in on Thursday at 10:00 am!”
Me: “No, I told you, Monday, Thursday and Friday are no good!”
“Well then, how about Friday? Say at 10?”
Me: “No, I told you, Monday, Thursday and Friday are no good!”

Hmmmm…. Can you hold a minute? The mechanical voice comes on again and starts reading the first chapters of Dr. Zhivago, when it is interrupted.

I can fit you in on the 12th of next week?
Me: “ I’ll take it.”

God I hope she isn’t the dentist!

1 comment:

Laura ESL Teacher said...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...perhaps they will be reading that after they finish War and Peace. Hope your dentist visit goes well. I hate going myself!