BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY’S

Well, maybe not, but having breakfast with me is an adventure. After church, TLW (The Little Woman) and I go to breakfast at this great little diner that I love. It makes the best French Fries, and has great rye bread from a bakery, or so we think.

Sitting in a booth facing each other we got comfortable before ordering and I noticed how long the table is. We are sitting at the end of the table near the aisle, and not the wall. On the table against the wall are the salt and peppershakers, and the ketchup. Being a man with plans, I decided to take the items mentioned and move them down toward us so when the food does come, I won’t be leaning over the food reaching for the items.

Carefully I take the ketchup bottle, and situate it at the midpoint of the table and put the shakers in front of it, very neatly, side by side. I feel the eyes of the world on me, as I look up and notice TLW is watching. A smirk is beginning to curl on her lips.

Me: “Shut up.”

She continues to smile and doesn’t say anything. Finally breakfast is over, we get the check and she says: “The reason I was smiling is not that you moved things closer, but how precise and orderly you reset them”.

My first inclination was to knock over something, then; I decided instead, to make her pay the tip.

I have to say that I do get somewhat nuts about order. Things should be as convenient as possible for me, since usually things aren’t, and I have to struggle. The one time I can control things, and I’m getting laughed at!