SHE’S A LADY

When she enters our home, her home, she enters with a smile, and a big wave. Her smile can cause me to lower the sun on a sunny day at noon.

When she sees me, her smile tells me she knows who I am, and that I will give her whatever she wants. That earns me a hug or two. Hugs are tough to come by, especially for a funny looking father! But once I get one, I remember it forever.

She started her life out pretty normal and quickly went down hill, along with any dreams her mother and I had for her. Through the years, we all struggled, working to make our lives whole, not knowing where we were going. She was in the forefront of all our efforts, and we never lost sight of her.

Once a long time ago, we thought she would talk, but she doesn’t, yet she can make herself understood. Her mother is her priority and her mother’s priority is her special needs daughter.

They called her retarded, developmentally disabled, and every label in between, but we called her Ellen. She will always be Ellen and she will define our family. We lost a child once and we mourned but never forgot him. Ellen we mourn every day, every moment we know that what should have been isn’t. There’s something that is very dear to my heart that goes: “Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: It might have been. And so that defines every parent or sibling that relates to someone like Ellen.

But there is something that the outside world never sees, never experiences, never knows. That something lies in the inner being of people like my daughter. That something is awareness, awareness as to whom she belongs to, who she is, and the uplifting spirit she owns carries us through her life until we are gone.

I guess we think God can be cruel, when he is giving us a gift. That gift is in a humble being, who when opened, can benefit the whole world by what we do with the gift if only we realize it.

I have spent many many hours on board business and various committees, many hours on donating time and effort with talent that God gave me. I guess I could make money on it, but that would be sacrilegious and non productive. I instead invest that talent and time into helping my daughter and her friends that inhabit her world.

You are so beautiful to me
You are so beautiful to me
Can't you see
Your everything I hoped for
Your everything I need
You are so beautiful to me

Such joy and happiness you bring
Such joy and happiness you bring
Like a dream
A guiding light that shines in the night
Heavens gift to me
You are so beautiful to me