THE MIRACLE OF THE LIGHTS

Yesterday, while suffering from some stomach malady, I decided to put up the old Christmas tree. So I went out into the woods, wearing my high boots and plaid shirt, looked around, realized I didn’t have a saw or the inclination, and went back home into the garage and pulled down the tree we bought with the lights already on it.

Once I put the stand together, stuck in the correct sections (three), I of course took a rest. TLW (The Little Woman) was home from work and immediately if not sooner inspected my craftsmanship and mechanical abilities. Needless to say none were present and she decided to fool with the lights. It seems some of the lights weren’t blinking, and last year when we had the same problem, I suggested that when she looked at the tree that she blink her eyes instead.

I think this is a very prudent and wise solution if you study the problem first hand. The tree lights go in every direction, with multi cords and plugs, all have to be set in such a way for the tree to light. Besides, did you ever see a tree with light emenating from it, without it being on fire? I go for realism whenever possible

TLW on the other hand believes that you must obey the rules (except for stop signs) that come from her Catholic School background. She is more honest than Honest Abe Lincoln, holier than Benedict the Pope, and I can’t even slip a cycleable into the garbage without her making me put it into the cycleable bin.

I am almost ready for Christmas, just a few details to iron out, like writing cards and wrapping a few presents, making some stuffed shrimp for Christmas Eve dinner for my Sisters and Mother, Of course, I have to make cookies for TLW for her office, (this should send them all to Weight Watchers) in a hurry.

Going to Weight Watchers would scare me; it must be something like an AA meeting, not that I’ve ever been to one.
“Hi, my name is Joe Del Bloggolo, and I ate the chocolate donuts TLW is looking for!”
Then I would start to sob, knowing there were no more left.

I overcame my stomach problem late that afternoon, and feeling so good, while TLW went off to Weight
Watchers proceeded to make a spicy chicken dish with homemade pasta. I will be grilled on how much olive oil I used, (1 Tablespoon for the chicken.)

Today I will do the Christmas Cards and send them out, and I fully intend to not include what we did as a family this year, I even hate that. That from someone who writes a blog everyday!

As for the tree lights, IT AIN”T OVER YET!