RED ARGYLE SOCKS

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I am a man of tradition! I am a man for nostalgia and things that make me comfortable.

Some of what I do is to make me feel a certain way, for instance at Christmas, when I eat the traditional Lobster sauce with spaghetti, it brings back childhood memories and the taste of the sauce puts me in both my mom’s and grandmother’s kitchen, tasting not only a delicious sauce, but reliving history, the distant echo of Italian being spoken, the taste of almond wedding cookies and anisette in black coffee, or the multitude of Italian pastries. Tradition is important to me.

Every Christmas on Christmas day only, I wear a pair of red argyle socks, that have been with me for many years. 364 days a year they sit in my sock draw, but on Christmas morning, they go on!

So one morning as I’m reaching for my regular socks, something strikes me but I can’t put my finger on it. That night at dinner I realize what it was that struck me. My red argyle socks were not in view! I mention this to TLW (The Little Woman) and she says she knows nothing about them, almost saying: don’t accuse me you four eyed bag of meatballs!

The next morning I reach for a pair of socks and there sitting under the pile of socks is the red argyle socks! What happened? I don’t know, but I know they were there all that time I was missing them. I go downstairs to have my coffee and mention to TLW that Christmas is saved!

“What do you mean?”

“I found my red argyle socks!” I say happily.

“Oh, so your insinuation that I threw them out wasn’t so!”

“I didn’t insinuate that!”

I think she didn’t throw them out, but thought maybe she did, and a bit of guilt overcame her. She is known to throw out useless old clothes, so I think she is guilty by insinuation and innocent of all wrongdoing. She would be exonerated in a court of law. Of course if she did throw out my stuff while I’m wearing it, that would be another issue.

Happy Birthday 

to my brother-in-law Tom, who if he had taken better care of himself, 

would still be single today!