IT’S AMAZING

On our TV we have a box. The box hooks us up to the cable network and all the cable channels. On the hookup we can record shows and watch them at our leisure. And this is a good thing. However it does have its drawbacks.

TLW (The Little Woman) likes a show called “Major Crimes” and I’m sure some of you are familiar with it. Having a cast of characters that come on the show every week, the regulars solve a murder. They never solve a purse snatching or pick pocket!

Well I have seen one episode so many times I know the whole dialogue by heart! Yes, I can repeat the words of all the characters verbatim, and the ending keeps happening the same way, every time I watch it.

It’s amazing what technology has brought us, what wondrous things there are. I have seen the same episode two and sometimes three times a night? What do I owe this dedication, this fascination and devotion to one show to?

Well it seems every night TLW takes the remote and says:

“Is there anything you want to watch Joe?”

“No, whatever you wish.”

She goes onto the Cable and calls up the last “Major Crimes” she has recorded and settles in and watches it. Not all of it, just about half of it, because you see, she has fallen asleep. Yes, she has drifted off, with a death grip on the remote control and two hands that will strangle me to death if I dare try to take it while she is asleep.

There are few things scarier than TLW awakened from sleep with the remote in her hand. If I am near enough, the look of “I’m going to kick your ass, finally” crosses her face. The deep sense of need to beg for forgiveness crosses my heart.

So she finally goes off to bed, leaving me with the sense of guilt because I won’t let her watch her show in peace. I feel like a cad.

So, tomorrow’s episode of “Major Crimes” will be today’s, and yesterdays and the day before that. I will look for a new way to watch it and surprise myself. How about standing on my head?

I decided I am the perfect husband, I keep my head down, my guard up and I keep my mouth shut, utilizing the words: “Yes Dear.”

Somewhere there is a husband who has seen the complete episode of “MAJOR CRIMES” and somewhere children play, some where hearts are singing and somewhere wives will stay, but there is no joy in DelBloggoloville, mighty TLW will have her way.