BIDING TIME WITH THE IRS

I live in a world of contradiction, surprises and general disappointment. For years, whenever I expected something nice to happen for me, things for some reason would change. I won’t go into specifics, but believe me they changed. With the change would come disappointment. “Sorry, we are all out of it. We don’t do that any more” Or, “We just changed our policy.”

If you happen to be on an errand, say to the Post Office, Motor Vehicle Department, bank or perhaps a breadline, waiting to get assistance to feed your starving 19 year old, and you see me there on line, DON’T GET BEHIND ME. I say this as a courtesy. Why you ask? Because the person ahead of me will do something to slow the whole friggen world down, leading to a bubbling inner frustration. I can always grab defeat from the jaws of victory.

Years ago, I would commute home from a long day in the city, where I worked as an art director for various ad agencies, and then later for a major marketing company that gave away millions of dollars without Ed McMahon’s help. In those days, everything was done by hand. I would “Comp” a mailing package, designing, and lettering everything before it went into production. It could be labor intensive if the project was a big one. It would never fail, that some copywriter would get feedback from higher ups, and have to change the heart of the project because the writer didn’t get it right. That is to say, his direction was incomplete, and those giving it, incompetent. It meant I had to change everything! Do it all over again. I’d get home and wail against copywriters, telling TLW (The Little Woman) how dumb writers are, and they should all be shot.

Life has a way of playing little tricks on me. Not only did I raise one writer, #1 Son, but now #2 Son is looking to write also. On top of all this, I just signed up for the firing squad. I am now doing three writing projects! OK, so what?

Yesterday I had lunch with an old buddy, and business partner, who happens to be a writer. What else? It turns out he not only writes, but now works for the IRS also! The IRS!! What did we talk about? Advertising, prose, literature, maybe the techniques of writing, no, we talked about reasons why people are late in paying their taxes.

Well, two things come from yesterday, fodder for the pen, and tips on staying honest and avoiding jail.

Need relief from the taxing task of reading this blog?
Write to: joedelbroccolo@yahoo.com,
Tell him: “By April 15th, I hope to see your picture in every post office.