Call TLW (The Little Woman).
Growing up in a house filled with both older and younger women, more often than not I was viewed as an oddity. I never thought along the same lines as my Mother and four sisters, so we were not always on the same page. And when it came to me being a male, either as a boy or man, certain traits would kick in. One of those traits was looking for something and not finding it. I would stick my head in a closet to find a certain item, not see it and call: “Mom, I can’t find it!” “Did you look in the closet?” asked Mom. “Yeah, it’s just not in here.” Mom would get up, come to the closet, blindly stick her hand into the closet and retrieve the item, without a pause. “There is none so blind as he who will not see.” Said Mom. She said it often enough, and frankly speaking; I think it was all a setup. Whenever she said it, I would mouth the words along with her. If you notice, she always said: “HE who will not see.” Another favorite of hers was; “If it were a snake it would have bit you.” (Definitely a cranky old lady.)
Then one day I got married, and the trait took on new characteristics. The newer traits are trying to figure out certain devices TLW bought from the Internet or store, certain techniques she employs to do certain jobs, and other things to get me into trouble. If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that TLW pretty much bosses me around (and I love it), and again I think I am being set up. What is happening is she is giving me a job to do, and when I get into it, some kind of question will arise, where I need to ask her what to do, and she looks like a genius.
A few weeks ago were a historical day in the annals of Joe Del Bloggolo incompetence, as I turned the tables! It seems she didn’t have certain liquids or baking powder to soften up a baking pan. The pan had burnt on the bottom from some brown sugar. I suggested using dish detergent on the bottom of the pan, and letting it soak in hot water. It was like she hit the lottery, telling me I had finally caught on, leaving me feeling very proud of myself for a change.
Now, if I can only find something, without her help.
Need help finding relief from this blog? Then write to:
Tell him: “I hope they find you with Jimmy Hoffa.