I HAD TO CHECK!

The other morning, TLW (The Little Woman) was on her way out to her car to go to work. I was doing my customary chores in the morning out in my yard and saw her, so I asked: “Are you leaving me? Is it because of the new NYS Divorce law?”

I’m sure you are all aware that NYS will have a ‘No fault’ divorce law, which will make the state like every other state in the union. Not being too sure if I like the law or not, I have to be careful now how I deal with TLW!

Just imagine the complications for all us happily married men!

TLW: “It’s over!”
Me: “What?”
TLW: “I SAID it’s over!”
Me: Looking up, “What’s over?”
TLW: “Us. We are over.”
Me: “What do you mean?”
TLW: “Look, it’s not your fault, it’s me.”
Me: “I know it’s you, but what are you talking about?”
TLW: “When I married you, you were 26, had all of your hair, and none of your fat! YOU are no longer you!”
Me: “I’m not? Well, actually if you look at it, I’m more of me!”
TLW: “No! Nothing personal, but I have to look for the 26 year-old I married. It’s not your fault, I just need consistency.”
Me: “But I thought you loved me all these 40 years!”
TLW: “Nah.”
Me: “Oh! Well then, you get the kids.”
TLW: “Nooo, you get the kids, I had them all those years, while you went off to work and had a good time. And another thing, what about how you took all the blankets away last night? Not once did you think that maybe I was cold?”
Me: “But Toots, it’s July and we are in the middle of a heat wave!”
TLW: “See, it’s always my fault, never yours!”
Me: “Well, IF you do go find another 26 year-old, will he be like I was?”
TLW: “Of course, it was love at first sight!”
Me: “Good, because I was stinking broke!”

Of course this is only an imaginary scenario, but you see the problem? We will make it too easy for ourselves to ruin a decent institution, over the silliest of reasons! I really don’t think TLW will follow that example, although if I were her, I would.

Tomorrow: Why she shouldn’t leave me!