ONCE YOU FALL OFF

You never forget.

On my recent mini-vacation down at Cape May, TLW, (The Little Woman) and myself, along with my brother- in-law Steverino, and my lovely sister-in-law, Sara, (TLW’s sister’s husband and brother’s wife) decided to take advantage of the most spectacular weather Cape May can offer. Under a beautiful clear blue sky, and bright shinning sun, with temperatures in the mid-70’s and a gentle ocean breeze, we decided to go rent bicycles and enjoy our selves for the day.

With a little trepidation, we selected our means of transportation, one of which transported us all back to our childhood, making us feel 12 again, and started our tour of Cape May. In fact, I was worried I had to get back home before dinner and my father would have to come looking for me! Thinking and feeling confident that I could do this again, I pushed off on the higher of the pedals just like I used to, and wobbly started my ride, scared out of my every living mind that I would hit a car, or maybe a tour bus, and at least take out a few tourists!


The first order of business was to cross the street, show no fear, and hope when I get killed, it is quick. As the front wheel refused to totally cooperate with me, I wiggled across the street, when at some point I realized I would have to stop. What to do in case of an emergency and a red light? I decided to do what any sane person like me would or should do, I would: a) fall off the bike, 2) while bleeding profusely, pretend I am fine.

It seems all the cars in Cape May are wider than regular cars I find on Long Island, as they fly down the streets of Cape May and force me to pray and curse all in the same breath! This is called multi-tasking.

As we biked across the island, taking in hidden sights and finding places I never dreamed I find myself in, we came across a lemonade stand, where we stopped. For 50 cents each, I treated everyone with a glass, the proceeds going to Jerry’s kids! Being it was the Labor Day weekend, the telethon was in full swing, and we did our small part.

Well the one thing that was most difficult was to remember to pedal backwards as I coasted to a stop, gentle applying the brakes, but when I did stop, getting my body in a dignified stance of nonchalance stature and soundless ease. Instead of my crashing into my poor sister-in-law, while going: “oooph!” while she is saying, “I’m good, I’m good!” and my apologizing for being a klutz.

There well may be no ‘next time!’