Sunday, November 09, 2008

STRANGE COINCIDENCE



It seemed like my arms were about to fall off ! Every day, Count Dracular would come and draw some blood, leaving my one arm filled with ugly bumps and blotches, as they tested my blood. No one was so sure as to what it could be. The fever and aching were still there, and nothing seemed right,

One night, Dad comes to visit. Dad was skittish! Once Dad fainted in a dentist chair, and Mom called me to come and get him! It was about a half hour after they did a bone marrow extraction from my chest. The technician sprayed a red dye on my chest, stuck a needle in and then a tube. Putting a needle in the tube, they extracted the marrow. They put a mirror up so I could watch the procedure, asking if I wanted to see it. Dad entered by himself and asked how I was doing. I told him good and then he spots the red dye on my chest, thinking it is blood! He backs into a chair in the corner of the room, opposite my bed.

“What the hell happened?” Dad was nearly unconscious when he asked.

“Oh, this? It’s nothing, just a dye they sprayed on me.”

Summoning up the courage, he asks: “Why?” as he rises and comes to the bed, felling a little better, color coming back to his face.

“Oh, they needed some bone marrow, so they stuck a tube in my chest and with a needle extracted some bone marrow!” I answered nonchalantly.”

Immediately he retreats to the chair! Sitting there he says: “Quit fooling around and answer me!”

I assure him that my story is true. He looks around and spots the mirror that was hanging over the bed.

“What is that mirror for? Your makeup?”

“No, so I could watch them take out the marrow.”

Back into the chair he goes. White as he sheet, he looks at me and says: “Cheez, you let them do that to you?”

If Dracular wasn’t enough, the hospital was constantly sending me for tests and x-rays of all kinds. One Friday morning, as I lay on a table for a kidney scan, my doctor popped his head into the room and said I was getting a liver biopsy the next day!

“We stick a needle in your liver and pop out a piece.”

At this point, I could care less. Take whatever you need, but kill me first, was what I wanted.

The next morning, TLW is standing at the bed.

“Good news! You are being released today! The doctor said you can go home, you’ll be fine!”

“What happened, I feel lousy?”

Then she related a most amazing story. It seems my doctor had a brother who practiced out of one of the large hospitals in NYC. HE, had the same thing! Only weeks before, he was finally over it, and my doctor played his hunch, compared the medical side of things with his brother and they both came to the same conclusion! I had what my doctor’s brother had!

Hey, everybody.

Good news! The latest Mountain Man Academy video is up on UCBComedy.com. It's called "NPR Dancers" and it's directed by Matt Walsh (of "The Upright Citizen's Brigade" on Comedy Central).

You should check it out. The more people who watch it, the more likely the Upright Citizen's Brigade will shoot another video of the group. My good pal Peter Dirksen is init. F-U-N-N-Y.

Here is the link:

http://www.ucbcomedy.com/videos/play/3019


Please remember my pals Joan and DD in your prayers.

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